Tag Archives: check

Misery Loves Company (Jan. 2)

Posted on January 2, 2009 | Leave a comment
flair

If only employees had shown this much heart and flair.

TGIFriday’s Closes, 60 Laid off for Lack of Flair

Lack of flair caused disharmony in a San Mateo T.G.I.Friday’s, causing its owners to close it down.  Owners said the negative economy and no one wanting to pay$12 for deep-fried lard were not causes of its demise.

Contra Costa County Lays Off 65 Child Welfare Workers, Drug Prostitute Moms Rejoice

Contra Costa County laid off child welfare workers because the county needs to promote its meth production. “While CoCo County is known only for its meth and cocaine use, it’s also a central distributor and producer of meth,” said County Supervisor Parker McGinty. “We feel our drug prostitutes are the best ambassadors. Child welfare workers cause them to clean up their act to get their kids back. Silly, really.”

Continue reading →

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , ,

Misery Loves Company! (Dec. 2)

Posted on December 2, 2008 | Leave a comment
SchwarziSigns

At a recent press conference, the Governator attempts to kill a nosy reporter with his optical death ray.

California Has Highest Unemployment Rates in Nation (Almost, But Who Cares About Rhode Island?)

Statewide unemployment rocketted to  8.2 percent in October, a 14-year high. Only Michigan and Rhode Island, both considerably cheaper and known as the Kmart of states, had higher joblessness, both at 9.3 percent. Our illustrious EDD showed a loss of 26,400 jobs last month. And the worst part . . .

Governator Says We Don’t Have Money, So Please Work at 7-11 Already

Gov. Schwarzenegger declared his 143rd “state of emergency” this year, this time writing in “Fiscal” in front of the emergency press release,  in hopes of getting a federal bailout. But since he doesn’t own a bank and isn’t an automaker, the old action hero may be out of luck — and the state’s running out of money to pay for unemployment benefits, so says the North County Times – if you believe what someone from Escondido says, that is.

J.P. Morgan Chase Tells WaMu Workers, “Woo Hoo! You’re Laid Off!”

Chase lays off 21 percent of WaMu employees, about 1,600 in the Bay Area that will celebrate Spring by being unemployed. Enjoy the empty Easter baskets, kids, Chase killed the Easter Bunny!

Continue reading →

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , ,

I got my first unemployment check!

Posted on July 31, 2008 | Leave a comment

barbarabillingsleyAll $405 of it. I feel like an equal in my marriage again. Previously I was channeling my June Cleaverness and having dinner on the table for the hubby when he came home and decorating the home with flowers.

I was going to change into a dress, but settled for a clean top and exercise pants. Hey, June, you’d wear a pink tracksuit nowadays anyway. It’s what I see all the trophy wives wearing (and yes, June, you would be a trophy wife! Cooking in pearls, my!)

I’m also learning how to shop and use what I buy! (OK, yeah, but we had tons of money before, so if some food was thrown away, no biggie.) Now everything we buy has to have some use and be eaten. The oven-fried chicken I made last night will be our “El Pollo Loco” rip-off chicken tonight.

No, I’m not going all Dave Ramsay, who by the way has some RABID fans. I have no debt to speak of (only $1,200 I’ll be reimbursed for in a month) and am not going to spend five hours making my own detergent to save 20 cents a load.

→ Leave a comment

Posted in Uncategorized

Tagged , , , , , , ,