Monthly Archives: November 2008

Laid-Off Journal is on Thanksgiving Vacation!

Yes, it could just be that I’m lazy, but I also need some mental health days to deal with parents and lots of questions about my job prospects.

The LOJ will be back on Tuesday!

Misery Loves Company! (Nov. 18, 2008)

SunshirSun Microsystems to Lay Off 6,000, Little or No Sunblock

Microchip maker Sun Microsystems decides to lay off 6,000 globally, is cursed at in 32 languages.

Oakland closes libraries, museums because kids need to stay on drugs/have crime sprees

In an effort to save money, the City of Oakland decided to close down its city buildings/services like its libraries, museums and city offices at least once a month. “Kids don’t go to libraries and museums anyway,” said City spokesman Scrooge McGinty. “Besides in Oakland, while the kids may not excel in school or academics, here they excel in street crime. It’s letting the kids get better at what they do.”

Continue reading

Misery Loves Company! (Nov. 11, 2008)

02seasonal_xlarge1

The Cool People You Meet Working at the Container Store

Getting a Temp Job at a Store this Holiday Season, Is Harder than Getting into Stanford

OK, they said Harvard, but I’m in California, so what do I care? Anyway, that said … $8.50 an hour or a degree in engineering? “Nah,” said Sanjay McGupta, “I’m not into all that high-tech stuff, too much turnover. I want a four-week, $8.50 an hour job at the Container Store.”

DHL To Lay off 9,500, Promise Customers Will Still Get the Same Crappy Service

DHL lays off 9,500 and pulls out of Riverside, Calif. But really, if you’ve been to Riverside, Calif., it’s hard to believe it took them this long. In fact, the experience was so scarring, DHL is pulling out of commercial U.S. domestic shipping altogether. “Riverside, so mindnumbing, so full of meth and white trash, it killed all our hard-won German, almost Nazi-ish, militaristic morale,” said Dieter McGoebbels.

Continue reading

Just a note

ist2_2234414-sickEven the unemployed get sick. It’s not much different from the rest of the week, really, except you growl at your spouse if he or she suggests you do anything around the house (OK, not that much different from the rest of the week.)

So bear with me for a few days while I try not to vomit every hour on the hour.

Misery Loves Company! (Nov. 7, 2008)

51T6PhULL2L__SL500_

Mattel Cuts 1,000 Jobs, Barbie Plans to Go Back to College and Get Her Master’s

Toy maker Mattel said Thursday it’s cutting 1,000 positions worldwide. Barbie will now work on her master’s degree in French literature while Tickle Me Extreme Elmo begins his career in furry porn. 

 Maxim Integrated Products Closes San Jose Facility, Scantily-Clad Starlets Laid Off

Maxim Integrated Products will probably close its San Jose, Calif. and Dallas fabrication facilities after its titillating articles and hot photo shoots failed to bring more profits in the third-quarter. Continue reading